Let Him Cook-
Why Husbands Need Room to Lead
By Jimmy Sliwa
Every husband wants to feel respected by his wife to let him do his thing.
That respect isn’t just a feel-good bonus—it’s what gives a man the courage to lead with confidence.
But when there’s no space for respect to grow, leadership becomes difficult. A man might still show up, but he won’t show up at his best.
What Respect Really Means
One of my favorite definitions of respect is this:
“A feeling of deep admiration for someone elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.”
This definition of respect is powerful. It says, “You’re capable. I see your potential. I believe in you.”
Respect isn’t optional—it’s oxygen for a husband to take the lead. It’s the fuel that drives a man to step up at home, at work, and in his marriage. It affirms something deep in him:
You’ve got what it takes.
When Love is Loud, But Respect is Quiet
Here’s the challenge: sometimes love is loud, and respect is quiet.
A wife may deeply love her husband but unintentionally communicate distrust when she takes over everything. She might do it out of habit, efficiency, or good intentions—but the message it sends is this:
“I don’t need you to lead. I’ve got it.”
And that’s where the phrase “Let Him Cook” comes in.
Sure, it’s a funny phrase. But in marriage, it means something deeper:
Give your husband space to step up.
Let him try. Let him fail. Let him grow.
Give him room to lead—even if it’s not your way or on your timeline.
Men Don’t Thrive Under Micromanagement
Men rise when they’re trusted.
When a wife cheers her husband on instead of correcting him, when she encourages him instead of critiquing every move—he doesn’t just try harder.
He becomes stronger.
He leads with more care, more wisdom, and more heart—because he knows she’s behind him, not hovering over him.
Let Him Own It
Let him plan the trip.
Let him pray over the kids.
Let him build the shelf, organize the finances, or surprise you with a date (even if it’s not Pinterest-perfect).
It may not be flawless, but it will be his.
And when it’s his, he owns it. He grows in it. He leads with confidence—not because he’s perfect, but because he knows he’s respected. to
Let Him Lead
I’m not referring to outdated stereotypes or power struggles. This isn’t about who’s “in charge.” It’s about mutual respect and giving your husband the opportunity to operate in his strengths.
Many men naturally want to protect, provide, and problem-solve. This is how a man finds value.
It a big deal for a husband to offer value to his family. This is why we want to contribute and make an impact.
But if every decision is second-guessed and every initiative is shut down, we’ll shrink back. We’ll stop trying. Not because we don’t care, but because we no longer feel valued enough to lead.
Letting a man lead doesn’t mean silencing yourself—it means trusting his heart and giving him space to grow into his role.
Let Him Build
Every man is a builder at heart. He may not be framing houses or designing skyscrapers, but he’s building something—a family, a legacy, a vision, a career, a future. And sometimes that process is messy. Sometimes it doesn’t look like the blueprint. Sometimes it means staying up late with big ideas and early mornings with calloused hands.
Letting him build means encouraging the process. Cheering him on even when the end result is still in progress. Believing in what he’s trying to create before it’s finished.
Is he building a business? A new routine? A deeper faith? A better version of himself? Then let him cook.
Let Him Thrive
A thriving man is one who feels seen, respected, and backed by the woman he loves. He doesn’t need permission to be himself, but your support? That’s powerful fuel. Your belief in him could be the difference between him playing it safe and stepping into his potential.
So, what does that look like practically?
Let him make the decision sometimes—even if it’s not how you would do it.
Let him try the new idea—even if it flops.
Let him pursue his passion—even if it’s still a side hustle.
Let him plan the date night—even if it’s just burgers and a movie.
Let him cook the meal—even if the kitchen looks like a tornado hit it.
Because it’s not about perfection. It’s about progress. And when a man feels trusted, he rises to the occasion.
Final Thoughts
Marriage is a dance. Sometimes you lead, sometimes he does. But when you step back and give him space to move in his strengths, you’re not giving up control—you’re giving him confidence.
So the next time your husband is taking initiative, working on something with passion, or showing up in a new way—resist the urge to take over.
Just smile, sit back, and say with love and confidence: “Let Him Cook”
