"Carpe the Calendar" - Master Your Time
By Jimmy Sliwa
I can always tell when I’ve overcommitted my schedule – my sleep plummets, my gym routine flops, and tensions rise in my marriage.
It’s a negative trifecta, and the result of packing my schedule too full.
Between work, household responsibilities, and trying to find some time for myself, it can feel like I’m constantly pulled in a hundred directions.
If you’re like me, the days fly by, and sometimes you wonder, “where did the time go?”
But what if I told you that with a few simple strategies, you could take back control of your time and feel more on top of things, both at home and at work?
That’s what I’ve done with my schedule and, let me tell you, it feels good to finally be in control.
How can this be done?
- The answer: “Carpe the Calendar”
It’s time you “carpe the calendar”—seize your schedule and master your time.
Carpe the calendar is a play off on the popular phrase Carpe Diem – seize the day.
While I love the concept of seizing the day, I believe the ONLY way to truly seize the day is to master your schedule.
By making your calendar work for you, you can strike the perfect balance between being a dependable husband and still having room for the things you enjoy.
Here’s how to make it happen!
How Busy Husbands Master Their Time
1. Use a Family Calendar
As a husband, you are not just handling your personal schedule, you are juggling your wife’s and kids as well. The BEST way to do this effectively is to sync up your schedule with your family.
How do you sync your schedule?
Well for starters, you need an actual calendar that you and your wife use daily!
You have many options – calendars, planners, and digital calendars can all work.
Personally, I like a physical calendar best. Our world is already saturated with digital gadgets that rob our time. For me a digital calendar is too easy to check the news or social media when I should be checking my schedule.
So, we opted for a physical family calendar that sits in a spot that we see daily. Ours is posted up in the kitchen.
This way every time I pass through to the kitchen I get a quick update on our family schedule. It’s easy for me to see what the day has in store and what future dates are coming up.
2. Schedule Yourself First
Many financial gurus say “pay yourself first.” This means before you delegate your money to ‘other means’ put money into your own savings and investments for the future.
The same goes for your time.
Schedule yourself first!
Schedule your priorities before everyone else books your time.
Before you start filling up your calendar with meetings, errands, and tasks, take a moment to ask yourself: What truly matters?
- Is it spending more quality time with your family?
- Getting in shape?
- Working toward a big career goal?
Whatever it is, those are the things that deserve the prime spots in your schedule.
Once you’ve identified your priorities, build your schedule around them. Make time for that date night, your kid’s soccer practice, or your personal workout session. The key is making sure your calendar reflects what’s most important, rather than getting filled up with distractions or time wasters.
3. Build in Margin
I once heard that Elon Musk will schedule his day down to 5-minute increments. While this may be necessary if you are the CEO of 5 companies, I think this is a terrible idea for the typical husband.
Your schedule needs to have margin built in.
Margin is a protective buffer of time added after an event or task to ensure against uncertainty.
Because let’s face it:
Projects are always harder and events often longer than we might expect. Without building in margin, you and your family will constantly be running from one task to the next, leaving little room to be present.
A day without margin looks like this.
- Eating food in the car because you don’t have time to sit and eat
- You break the speed limit just to get to the next thing
- You dread going to that event because you might miss something else
A sign of no margin is a feeling of constantly hurrying! For me this is when I often bark orders at the kids or get frustrated with my wife.
John Mark Comer the author of “Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” said it like this “Hurry and love are like oil and water, they do not mix.”
Constantly running from one thing to the next without margin is impossible to be present and rested.
So a BIG part of seizing your calendar is building margin into your day!
4. Guard Your Time
When it comes to mastering your time, one of the most important things you can do is protect it. Pay close attention to what gets added to your calendar.
If you’re constantly saying “yes” to extra work, unnecessary meetings, or even social obligations that don’t align with your priorities, you’re giving away time that could be better spent.
Time is your greatest commodity and it’s always running out!
It’s okay to say no to things that don’t serve your goals. Actual, it’s damaging if you don’t say “no.”
Protecting your time means having the discipline to stick to your schedule, even when it feels like you’re being pulled in a million directions.
Pro Tip:
If you’re worried about offending someone when saying no, try using a polite but firm response like, “I’d love to, but I already have a commitment at that time.” This keeps your calendar in check without burning bridges.
5. Leverage Technology
Ok, I know earlier I made the case for a physical family calendar, but there’s no shame in letting technology help you out. Especially if you and your wife are tech savvy.
Calendar apps like Google Calendar or Todoist are powerful tools that can keep you organized and on top of your game. They can send you reminders, sync across devices, and even suggest time slots for tasks based on your schedule.
I personally use google calendar to schedule all of my work obligations. This works well for me and it’s super easy to send to my wife if she ever requests.
Pro Tip:
Set up shared calendars with your spouse to keep track of family events, kids’ activities, and household responsibilities. This way, you’re both on the same page and can easily divide tasks.
Conclusion: Own Your Time, Own Your Life
Mastering your calendar isn’t just about being more productive—it’s about being more present and engaged in the areas of life that truly matter.
When you take control of your time, you take control of your life. You’ll feel more balanced, more accomplished, and, most importantly, more connected to the people and things that matter most.
So, husband, it’s time to carpe the calendar and start mastering your time. Your life, your marriage, and your peace of mind will thank you!
