Is Chivalry Dead?
By Jimmy Sliwa
Is chivalry dead?
As much as I’d like to shout NO, our culture would suggest otherwise. At least in the realm of marriage that is.
Take a look at these daunting statistics…
By Jimmy Sliwa
Is chivalry nearing extinction? I sure know in my marriage it was.
My lack of chivalry snuck in, like a thief in the night. It wasn’t a quick transition from romance to melancholy, but rather my lack of chivalry came in the form of complacency.
I still loved my wife but seemed to lack the motivation to surprise her with romantic gestures.
Like most men, I was endlessly creative when I started dating my wife. I wrote her love songs, gave her butterflies (literally), and left her notes and flowers all the time.
During the dating game, it was my main goal to make my wife feel pursued. I wanted her to know how much I cared about her, and I often went way out of my way to make her feel special.
It was during this time in life that our relationship blossomed. What started as a little seed soon began to sprout limbs.
The sad part of the story is that shortly after marriage to my bride, I rarely traveled down the romance aisle. I still had all the feels for her, but what I failed to deliver is what she craved. What I failed to plan she spent her days dreaming of.
Like countless married men, I’d hear my wife hint at the fact that she would love for me to plan a romantic getaway, but nothing seemed to materialize.
What was my deal?
Had we been boyfriend and girlfriend, I would have dropped all plans and made sure I made my wife feel special.
Fast forward six years and a bomb went off in our marriage. After a few years of complacency, my wife discovered on two separate occasions that I had been addicted to pornography in our marriage.
She no longer felt like the only woman in the room. This blow crushed her emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Not only did I pursue my wife less passionately, I also deceived her and betrayed her trust.
It wasn’t until after my wife discovered my evil porn habit for the second time that I knew I needed to make a change or risk losing my marriage. I desired something much greater out of my marriage than what I was cultivating. This is when I decided to create The Husband’s Club. It stood as a platform for myself and other married men to stand up and become leaders for their family again.
The mission of The Husband’s Club is to build a community of married men that QUIT being complacent and START taking action to rekindle chivalry in their marriage.
In my journey I have come to the realization that chivalry is NOT dead. It’s just old school. And if chivalry doesn’t adapt to modern times it will prove to be the next Blockbuster.
If you struggle with complacency in marriage, then choose to change. Choose to fight for love even when you don’t feel all the warm fuzzy feelings. Chivalry is not only making small gestures to demonstrate your love; it is also choosing to love in all situations: “for better or for worse.”
May the information, suggestions, and motivation found in The Husband’s Club be invaluable to you as a husband’s who loves his wife and wants more out of marriage.
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