Grow a Pair of Balls So Your Wife Doesn't Have Too
By Jimmy Sliwa
Experts say the key to facing your fears is to visualize success.
How is this for a visual? The next time you find your family backed up to the wall, picture your wife with a pair of hairy balls dangling between her recently shaved legs as she handles the situation. 😮
Now I know I sound a bit obtuse, but wouldn’t you rather be the one with the gonads rather than leave it up to your wife? So, if you find yourself shrinking back when you should be standing up, then this post is for you, mi amigo.
Confrontation is one of my biggest fears. As I muster up the courage to confront an uncomfortable situation, I often lean on my wife for motivation. She is very supportive, but equally tenacious.
I am lucky enough to be the one who sees my wife’s tenacity from time to time. To family and friends, she is sweet and passive, but I know my wife better than anyone.
This means I know what fires her up. My wife is passionate about protecting our family. I am not referring to physical protection as much as emotional protection. I have seen her go straight mama bear on more than one occasion.
Two instances stand out in my mind. The first is when she is protecting her children. She will not let other people speak poorly of our two kids. In an attempt to deflect harmful words from penetrating our children’s ears, Anna will shut down degrading language. She is not ashamed to tell people that their language is not true.
For example, our youngest daughter Kendall has been told from a young age that she would be the difficult child due to her temperament. But my wife has boldly shut those claims down and instead speaks life-giving words to my daughter.
The second instance is when my wife wanted to bless a homeless man. It was a sunny Saturday morning and we stumbled upon a hung-over homeless guy at the sports complex. Without skipping a beat my wife decided we needed to help out because the gentleman was obviously distressed. I followed in her shadow as she asked how we could help the man and prayed for him right in the open air.
I am thankful for my wife with all the tenderness and tenacity she possesses. But I want to be more tenacious. I want to be bolder. I want to be more courageous so that she doesn’t have to fight alone.
As I said earlier, I hate confrontation. I want everyone to like me, so I avoid confrontation at all costs. But I recognize this as a weakness, and I am working hard to become more courageous.
Growing a Metaphorical Pair of Balls is as Easy as 1-2-3...
Step 1: Recognize your faults/ fears. A few of my faults/fears are negotiating, confrontation, and fear of failure. All of these situations have the potential to harm my family if I don’t recognize them as weaknesses. But it’s not good enough to simply recognize your faults; you must do something about it.
Step 2: Admit your faults to your wife. In my opinion your wife needs to be your ultimate accountability partner. She knows you best, therefore she has the best opportunity to help you. There is power is confessing your faults. Admitting your weakness to your wife is equivalent to asking for directions from a stranger. It may be uncomfortable but it will get you to where you need to go.
Step 3: Look for and seize opportunities to grow a pair (the hairier the better). These opportunities are easily recognizable because they coincide with discomfort. For example, I am very uncomfortable negotiating a car deal. I often shrink back rather than stand up because I don’t want to offend the car salesmen. The reality is that negotiating a deal is an opportunity to save my family money. It’s an opportunity to get my family a reliable car. And ultimately it’s an opportunity to grow a pair of balls so my wife doesn’t have too!
4 Situations It's Best to Grow a Pair
When Admitting your wrong.
A heart-felt, honest-to-goodness “I am sorry” goes a long way in a relationship. It takes humility to express sorrow. But don’t stop at this small phrase. Be sure to include “I am sorry for _____________.” This takes ownership to the next level as you verbalize your wrongdoings.
When Negotiating for a deal.
Negotiating is not a fight against another person. A better way to look at it is that you are fighting to make a better future for yourself or for your family. Whether negotiating a car deal, home sale, or a job promotion, this is a prime opportunity to grow a pair.
Protecting your wife's feelings
You may not always see your wife’s point of view, but you have an obligation to protect her. She is your number one priority and you should strive to protect her physically but also emotionally.
Standing up for your beliefs
Having an opinion is one of the rarest qualities today. In this “I’m offended” culture it’s difficult to stand up for your beliefs. It tough to stick your neck out their, but this world needs some genuine and courageous husbands.
