There are four core emotions.

1. Happiness

2. Sadness

3. Anger

4. Fear

In American culture, happiness is the most accepted emotion.

This is why we always answer the question “How are you doing?” With “I’m good!”

It’s much easier to highlight happiness than to tell the truth. We want to appear that everything is good. If we answered this question honestly, we would risk letting our emotions out of the bottle.

And that would be a little too deep for many of us.

Of the other three remaining emotions, anger is the second most accepted emotion for men to feel. It’s not surprising when a man has a burst of anger.

It’s widely accepted as anger makes us look tough and in control.

Often, we explain it away as ‘boys being boys‘ or another case of ‘toxic masculinity.’

Lastly, sadness and fear are the least accepted emotions for men to show.

We have social constructs to thank for this. Society makes it clear that sadness or fear could be a sign of weakness.

The last thing that a man wants is to showcase his weakness.

Everyone cares about their image. We all want to be seen by others in a particular way.

As a result, men often suppress emotions involving sadness or fear, but elevate emotions like happiness or anger.

But it is important to understand that ALL emotions serve a valuable purpose. 

• Emotions motivate us to act appropriately.
• Emotions help us to relate to others. 
• Emotions help us lead purposeful lives.
• Emotions help us empathize with others.

Without understanding our emotions, we cannot have healthy relationships. This includes the marriage relationship.

It’s important for men to accept and experience the 4 core emotions. This way you can relate to your wife and kids, and contribute to healthy, sustainable relationships with them.